Thursday, August 12, 2010

some sad news from the outer banks

the past few days have been good. i have loved watching sweet ava play with her cousin drake. they love each other. ava does not really have any friends yet, so its so fun to see them interact. she has been swimming in the pool nakes and its precious. its nice to be away. and its nice to be with family.

but...today we did get a call from our p.a and the results of my pet scan came in...they found two more cancerous spots. so not only is the cancer in my neck & chest, but it was also found in my right tenth rib and my left hip. i have been having pain in both those places so its nice to have an explanation, but hard because it most likely means radiation along with chemotherapy. and hard because it means i am most likely stage 3 (or possibly 4...but we do not need to go there yet). that will be confirmed on the 24th when i see my doctor. so until then i will not jump to any conclusions until i hear it from my doctor. my p.a. will be calling us next week once she goes over this with my dr (who is on vacation) and we may need to see a radiation oncologist at some point next week. so its up in the air. our kind p.a did say based on what she sees its still curable. so i believe that. i have to. but my heart hurt a lot when we got off the phone. and again its real. this is our new reality.

although the news of tuesday was "good" the news from today is a bit disheartening. so please do not stop praying for our little family and asking God for a miracle. a big one. we trust he can do it.

my dear husband continues to serve me and love me in a way i have never seen. i did not know it existed, this type of love i mean. but it does and there is no one else i would rather go down this road with than my justin. i love you. and we try to rest...

49 comments:

  1. I am lifting you up in prayer right now.

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  2. praying with and for you - libby, justin, ava - to our God who holds the whole world in His hands.

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  3. praying for you all! ~ Shirl

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  4. You're on my heart and in my prayers. Stay strong and fight this. With faith, all things are possible.

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  5. Hang in there libby! We in MN pray for you!

    Kris in MN

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  6. I'm sorry that this week away was tainted by this news. We are still praying... Our pastor gave a message, this Sunday, about the man (lowered through the roof) that Jesus healed. He kept asking us 'Do you believe this REALLY happened?'... I don't know why I hesitated... but finally it hit me... YES! YES, He did! It's hard to have 'child-like' faith in this day and age where everything has to be explained... it's hard to simply BELIEVE. I pray that the Lord will give you child like faith as you come to him and ask for Him to heal you. He is able.
    Sorry... I'm writing as if I know you. I bet it's so weird that all these strangers know your story. But you are in my prayers daily and will continue to be. I signed up to bring a meal sometime next month... then you can put a 'face' to my rambling messages ;)

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  7. Matt 17:20 "I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you." Because of speaking my faith in my Father's power - my 4th son was born alive with apgars of 9 when he should have been brain-damaged or brain-dead. We had lost a little girl before we became pregnant with him. I battled fear in my mind - but spoke Faith Words - "Thank you God for this whole healthy baby." It was a miracle. The reality of the world is what you see - but look in the Spirit Realm, "What's bound on earth is bound in heaven and what's loosed in earth is loosed in heaven." Stop looking at "the reality" of the world - and start seeing it how God sees it - "Faith is the substance of things hoped for - the evidence of things not seen." You are fighting a battle - Speak Powerful Words of Faith! I speak it now over you, "Thank you God that Libby's cancer is healed!"

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  8. My family and I are praying for you!

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  9. I love you Libby, Keep up your strong faith and your positive attitude, that is vitally important to stay strong. Justin will help you through this bad time, lean on him when it gets you sad. He is strong, I am so proud of you both and that beautiful little girl. I am glad you are getting some rest. Please remember you are foremost in my mind and my prayers are for you. Grandma Ryder

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  10. Libby, I can just see little Ava nakes in the pool!
    My friend, Jessica, posted the story about the friends who lowered their friend through the roof on a mat. I love the picture. Now we are those friends, each of us on some corner of that mat, lowering you down. Jesus loves faith! We expect Him to heal you and tell you to get up and walk home. We are in this with you friend...all the way down :) We got your mat girl!

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  11. As always, I am praying for you Libby. Psalms 147:3 "He heals the brokenhearted, and bandages their wounds."

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  12. I will continue to keep you in my prayers, I have gained so much from you faith. Enjoy your time at the outer banks knowing your prayer warriors will not stop. much love to you

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  13. Libby & Justin,
    We are praying for you and you are in our thoughts all the time. Keep strong!
    Beth and George
    Walton, KY

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  14. I have continued to pray for you daily - that will not stop. God is good, all the time; All the time, God is good. What else do we have to hang on too? Praying daily . . and sometimes hourly - each time I look at my to do list.

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  15. Have you heard of the hallelujah diet? Google it! There is a place called hallelujah acres where they teach you raw diet/juicing, etc. That stops the cancer cells from growing. My pop pop shrunk a huge lung tumor to nothing and was healed with it. Something to consider :). I'll be praying for you. Your little girl is beautiful

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  16. So sorry to hear your most recent news Libby. I'll continue to pray, praying real hard for you to be healed. I'm so glad that you have Justin to lean on, pray with, cry with, and love during this difficult time. Lots of love to all of you.

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  17. love you so much and wish this wasn't the case. we will continue to be on our knees on your behalf...asking God to restore your health.
    continue to soak up the beach and your family...and when you get back, lets plan my next trip out. i'm ready. we have a river house to decorate!
    you've got this lib...don't you worry.

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  18. You are in our thoughts and prayers. Your family is on every prayer list in every church our family attends across the US. Your faith is inspirational.

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  19. lib, you are so covered in prayers, my own included. take comfort in that....know that, even though you did not receive the news you wanted today, news of healing is on the horizon. keep your head up, dear lib...love you!

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  20. Dear Libby,

    I can't help it - I cry every night when I read about you. Somehow it helps me and makes me better, stronger, closer to God. What you face isn't going to be easy. All you can do is hand it over to The Lord to fix. No person can deal with this on their own or even with family and friends so hand it to The Lord. Let Him relieve the weight on you shoulders as He's done for so many of us so many times. I'll pray for you again tonight. You have to hang around so that one day K and I can buy you and your family lunch, dinner, dessert, sushi - your choice.

    Thanks for not wasting it. You are keeping my head above water (except for some tears) every day. What you are doing holds so much more value than you'll ever know.

    Brad

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  21. Libby (Langeland) EppingaAugust 12, 2010 at 10:32 PM

    Pray? Of course. Easy.

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  22. Libby although I've never met you, you have really touched my heart. Your strength in your faith is amazing and your story is a true testimony of the body of Christ coming together. I pray for you everyday and your family is constantly on my mind. God has His hand on you, so continue to lean on Him and we'll continue to lift you high up in prayer.

    Your sister in faith,
    Jolynn Dupree

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  23. Libby and family- you don't know us. We're former YL Staff and current "Friends of YL" in Roanoke. Abby and Bjorn passed on your blog to us. I'll continue to pray for you guys, your support system, and for your faith to be multiplied through this. Amazing to think what God will teach you and so many others through something like this. Take Care. Your strength and attitude are inspiring and joyful to read about (especially your 'realness' in the hard stuff! That's ok, too!!). -Warmly, Erica and Adam Moseley

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  24. May God wrap you in his arms and carry you and your family through this.
    Stephanie

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  25. Libby, I worked with your dear Sister in Grand Rapids, Michigan. We're praying for you down here in Tennessee. We pray in faith that God will miraculously heal your entire body. We believe He can do this and will continue to pray He will do so.

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  26. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding" Proverbs 3:5
    The Terrells are keeping you so close to our hearts and praying for you all daily. We love you all so much. Keep your faith. God is going to do something Big with this. Give sweet baby Ava a kiss from me.
    Aunt Marlo

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  27. Praying for you Libby. Praying right now in Atlanta, GA!!!

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  28. I love watching the live traffic feed and seeing all the different areas across the US pop up--YOU are prayed for Libby. There is no problem too big or small for OUR God.

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  29. I pray you are savoring these final days at the beach. If I had a pretty voice, and could play the guitar AND were near you now, I would sing you this song ;) But for now, just the words will do.

    I have a maker
    He formed my heart,
    before even time began
    My life was in his hands

    He knows my name
    He knows my every thought,
    He sees each tear that falls
    and hears me when I call

    I have a father,
    he calls me his own
    He'll never leave me,
    no matter where I go

    He knows my name
    He knows my every thought
    He sees each tear that falls
    and hears me when I call.

    keep going Libby!

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  30. I'm so sorry to hear this recent news, and I hope you can enjoy the rest of your vacation. Praying for you & your lovely family in Hawthorne, NJ.

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  31. Libby
    My name is Kevin Eastway - old friend of your sister Allison from GRCHS. I've been on the YL Staff for almost 10 years in CA - on Sabbatical this summer and will be praying for your family along with so many others.

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  32. Prayer is power... it is wonderful how many are praying. Stay strong.

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  33. Our family is praying for you and yours. Your peace and strength is amazing and you are an inspiraton.

    The Marco Family

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  34. Hi Libby
    I don't know you, but I feel that I do. You are dear friends with Cherlynn Fagerheim who is my sister in law. I just wanted to reach out and let you know we are praying for you. I know this sounds simple but I was cleaning up from dinner listening to some music and a song came on and the lyrics really spoke to me and i thought of you. I am sure you know the song by KUTLESS, " What Faith can do". Anyways, just wanted to let you know you have so many prayers for you, and love and support. You are inspirational to all of us mothers across the world, your strength, your faith and your devotion.
    Love, Amy Gordon

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  35. Hi Libby,

    I'll say another prayer for you and your family from me tonight. I had what I'd consider one of the hardest of days. It was hard physically and mentally. I only slept for 3 and a half hours last night. In all of it, every time I felt tired or like I couldn't just keep going I thought of you and I kept going. Do me and the world the favor of going and going. You are a shining light for all of us. Never give up - God will never give up on you.

    As you get older, life for some reason seems to get harder. You gain weight, your memory weakens, your bills grow, your family ages and you miss the days that are now behind you. There's really only one constant in this life and that is He and He never changes, get's older, or loses faith in us. Like you, he encourages us to be better in so many ways. I'll say it once again, your are bridging a gap that I created between myself and the Lord. I'm closing that gap every day. I wouldn't have done it without you. Just think of how many more people your are helping and will help in your long life.

    My best regards,

    Brad

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  36. Libby and Justin, I have been praying daily and following your blog since my daughter, Jen Brzinski, share your news with me. Just wanted to share this website with you: www.leukemia-lymphoma.org

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  37. Libby - just signed into your blog today per your mom's suggestion... While I know Becky and Alison pretty well (and, of course your beautiful mom and the amazing Timmy) , I never did get much of a chance to know you - - or your wonderful husband. I'm sure the blog will reconcile that. Through your writing, I am not surprised to discover you've grown into a prayerful and strong person. Until now, my only memory of you is when, as a very little girl, you wondered down the block to my house looking for your lost pet rabbit... Had I seen it? No I said but good luck (honestly, never thinking for a minute you'd find your bunny if it had ventured my way which would have been at least 10 houses from mine!) Undeturred though, you just moved on to the next house. What a faithful little seeker I though! Boy, was my impression on target!!!! From this day out, my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your wonderful family as you continue to 'seek' and live every day to the fullest - no matter what your future holds. PS - of course you already know but other blog followers might be interested - - the rabbit was found and returned to the Schaafsma household (LOL)

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  38. Libby you are so lovely in every way, just keep your sights on Christ our Lord and I know he'll see you through this dark tunnel, for He is our Light and Salvation, and Great Healer. Grace and Peace
    Lorraine

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  39. Dear Libby,

    Lindsey Lugo shared your blog with me today. It's interesting how technology allows us to learn about what's going in people's lives we've lost touch with, and who are no longer an integral part of our world. I'm very grateful for it now, for how else would I have known about this?

    A lot of people are going to say things to try and cheer you up and be supportive and there will be so many moments you'll be grateful and so many moments you will want to scream, "You just don't understand". Your attitude is strong and amazing, but I know from a very real place your spirit is deeply wounded and afraid. I remember. About a year ago I started mentoring a girl who was diagnosed with Hodgkin's, same as me, same doctors, 23 -years-old. I've walked through her journey with her. Gone to chemo. Done puzzles. Grabbed a cocktail when she was feeling good. I've been honest with her when it felt like others were candy coating things. We've become close friends. Two strangers brought together by this disease. In the end, I am the one who has benefited the most, as it has actually made me grateful for my cancer experience.

    You and I, Libby, we're not strangers. We were once friends, and not because of ill will but just because of life's happenings, we haven't kept in touch. It's okay. And while we don't live in the same city or state, there is a lot to be said for "understanding". I am happy to "understand" with you, alongside of you, via prayer, on the phone, via email, anything. I am certain you'll have a huge troop of supporters walking this journey with you, and for that I am so grateful. And, if you need another supporter, someone to be real and who has been there and can cry and laugh and get angry and be joyful all at the same time, I'm here. Anytime.

    I am so sorry you have to go through this. It will not be fun. But a year from now, you will look at yourself in the mirror and see you are stronger than you thought, and God is more amazing than you even imagined. You will know something about life that others around you don't. The trees will be so green, the flowers so beautiful, and you'll be done with chemo. My friend, Amanda, just finished. She had Stage 4 - it was in her hip and shoulder as well. She's been cancer-free for four months. Everyone's journey is difference, but I hope you find encouragement from that. I just celebrated 10 years. God is faithful.

    Call me - 616-648-6795. Text me. Email me aftondevos@gmail.com. I am here. I am here.

    Aaron sends a hug your way.

    All our love,

    Afton

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  40. My daughter by love sent me your blog. She walks a similiar path starting 5 years ago with melanoma. Your words are so close to so many she said and wrote thru these past years. My heart and my prayers go out to you and your family, you shall daily be in our prayers.

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  41. Oh sweet Libby. I know your heart is aching, but just remember that HE is the Great Physician. None of this catches our good and perfect Savior off guard.

    YOU are fearfully and wonderfully made dear.

    Praying for you in Alabama

    -Rebecca

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  42. libby i love you and you are an amazing friend and i hope i can be a great mom like you
    im praying for you and God is looking out for you i know he is

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  43. We are praying for you!

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  44. Libby, I'm friends with your sister Allison and I have been praying for you, Justin and little Ava. I have two friends that beat the cancer that you're battling now and I know that you can do it too. My thoughts are with you every day.
    Susan Littler

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  45. Libby, I am on YL committee with Kess in Ohio. He passed on your blog to us. We will be continuing to lift you and your little family up in prayer to our Lord. I pray for complete healing for you as well as strength and encouragement.

    Amber

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  46. Im so so sorry! I am praying for you and your sweet family!!!!

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