Wednesday, September 1, 2010

a hurricane?

so we just moved into our dream house on the river and now the east coast is anticipating a hurricane. hurricane earl. i went to walmart to get a few things and was overwhelmed by hundreds of people stocking up on water, flashlights, batteries, toilet paper, and food. people take potential hurricanes real serious here. or maybe i am not taking it all seriously enough. either way with the help of our dear neighbors, who have dealt with storms before lets just hope our new home does not flood. i may not be able to handle that along with cancer.

so its been almost a week since my first chemo and my nausea and mouth sores are gone. i am pretty tired, but other than that feel good. so thankful. i think the hardest adjustment for me now is figuring out to handle being sick from chemo one week and then going back to "normal" for another week and then starting the cycle over. i decided that i can handle emotional pain better than physical pain. i have never asked god why. in regards to cancer. but i did ask god why my mouth has to hurt to bad. isn't cancer enough? why the side effects? but i guess its how it goes and we will learn to cope. i think i am the most scared of how chemo is going to impact me physically. because we will not really know until it happens. that is hard for me. the physical pain part. will it be cumulative? or will the pain not be as bad because i know what to expect now? the unknown is hard. but i did decide that worrying about it really will not help. even though we all know that i am really trying to just take all this as it comes.

ava crawled yesterday for the first time. and in just over 24 hours she seems like a new little girl. no more baby. she is a little girl now. not like a toddler little girl, but something in between. either way i love it.


  1. I think that is all you can do ~ "just take all of it has it comes" - one day at a time. Don't get too ahead of yourself. enjoy today!

  2. Take this time that you are feeling well to really enjoy Ava and do something nice for yourself, like a pedicure maybe. I'm glad that you are feeling better. I know it's hard, but try to enjoy the feeling good part of all of this.

  3. Yay, Ava! Isn't it just awesome when they discover new things?! Thank you, Lord, Libby's mouth sores are gone.

  4. Awww, go Ava! It is sad when they seem to get so much older in one day.

    Headbands and necklace goes out by the end of the week :-)

  5. As you take on your journey with cancer, cherish the journey that Ava will take with you. The firsts are always memerable, even if they happen to fast. Take comfort in knowing that God put Ava in your life so that when you might not be feeling great, one little look from her can change your whole outlook.
    Know that many people are out there praying for you all over the US.

  6. You always ground me. I'm lucky to be in your family. Love you. Batten down the hatches at river house, you homebody, you. Hang on for earl. As I've said've got this.

  7. Wish we could hunker down with you, eat your guacamole and just stare at our kids and the sweet things they do. So fun to picture Ava on the run!

    So thankful for how you are feeling today. I will pray for God to guide you through the good weeks, as well as the hard ones.

    I am praying for God's protection over the house, and over your body as you keep going... and getting closer :)

  8. Libby, I can't wait to hear how you metaphorically connect Ava's crawling, developing, growing, changing, into your own spiritual awakening! The analogy is in there, I know it!! -- Kristy

  9. Congrats on your little crawler! I so miss my guys being little! And when the first one crawled - he was our world! I know exactly how you feel mommy-wise.

    Cancer wise I don't - but I do know about "one step at a time" - and like when I delivered my sons - knowing I could do anything, for well, 24 hours - (I like setting time goals - I can reach time goals).

    And whining with humor. Not being down on yourself because you feel bad. I don't know if it's possible, but, stack up a couple of books, magazines, favorite movies (You ought to check out the old ones like The Quiet Man, or Mr. Blandings Builds his Dream House, or The man who stayed for dinner (the old ones have such layers of humor), have a quilt for the fam room couch with a bunch of pillows (so you don't have to continually drag things around) and settle in for a little R&R (rest and recovery)with Ava.

    You have such a beautiful heart. I pray for that kind of heart for my son's wives! I will add the protection of your house to my prayers - along with the continual prayers for you!


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