finally...

if i were you i would be annoyed with me. i am me and i am annoyed. i love this blog. i love this space. i love how it has given me a place to grow and be honest and share. lately life has just been a bit too much and this little blog has gone to the wayside. but i want to bring it back. my heart feels like it might burst with everything i am learning and feeling. but i am just straight up so tired at night to get myself to write. i am sad that little lyla's life has not been documented here. i so want this blog to be something for the girls. they will read it one day and be given a glimpse into their momma's heart. and ava...oh, strong little ava who is becoming a little girl. she is the best big sister. her love for teddy is more genuine than i ever imagined. especially this soon. praying these little ladies will be the best of friends for life. i am about to head to bed but little lyla is sound asleep on me so i want to share some highlights. this is what's been going down here on paul street.

1. lots of girl time. (we miss you babe).

2. nursing. a lot.

3. naps. mostly for lyla.

4. back to work. i kinda hate it. only 6 hrs a week.

5. making scarves. 

6. nursery decor

7. ava wanting to do everything on her own.

8. lyla: overall the best. a little fussy. loves to be held. if she could lay on me all day she would sleep all day. swear. 

9. not feeling totally overwhelmed. but certainly have my moments.

10. first thing ava asks for when she wakes up..." hey, mom where is my baby."

11. i eat a lot of dairy queen reeses blizzards.

12. i make a lot of target runs. even if just to stroll the aisles with the girls. but ava loves those huge carts and i hate them. i did find out yesterday that target now provides cup holders for your cart. so pretty much it's the perfect place.

13. we have great friends.

14. grief is heavy and i am sleepy.

15. but joy wins.

keeping my eyes on Christ. 

 

oh, man am i in love.

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yesterday i had never heard of it and now i am heading to texas.

hope spoken