cute tray for you.

loved reading all the comments from you.

the suitcase was pretty funny for sure.

it has been a good day but a long day.

the girls are both asleep and i finally caught up on work and our favorite show top chef starts soon 

so this will be a quick one.

winner of the adorable lucite tray from crystal faye is...

Melanie R.

"I love this blog! I think it's precious that Ava brought that suitcase with her to the dance. I totally would've done that as a kid too. :)"

congrats melanie. please email me at libbyryderblog@gmail.com to get your new tray.

crystal faye seems to add new items to her site daily and if you like a monogram than she is your girl.

i basically would not mind owning each and everything she sells.

don't forget that blog readers get 10% site wide with code DWYC10

www.shopcrystalfaye.com

goodnight from little lyla. sleep well everyone.

giveaway time.

it's been a restful weekend.

i did not realize how much my scan last week was weighing on my heart. last week felt dark and sad. but since we found out that it was clear i have felt more like myself. i have missed that.

hoping to get back into my life a bit more this week. that means actually taking a shower and getting ready, hanging with people i love, and spending a bit more time outside of the house.

justin and ava went to a dance together last night. it was a daddy/daughter valentines day dance.

it's a small thing but she felt so old last night. as she got ready. asked for a purse, (which ended up being a suitcase. she is kind of a hoarder) some make-up, and curly hair.

thankful for a husband who loves his girl as much as he does. it makes all the difference.

 a little fuzzy. 

 she did in fact drag a suitcase to the car. 

she was instructed it needed to stay in the car during the dance.

***

now onto the giveaway. 

my dear friend crystal is back with this super chic lucite tray.

at our house it is being used in lyla's nursery to hold lotion, baby wash, etc.

(nursery reveal at some point).

but it can be used for anything. maybe on a dining table, coffee table, dresser, bathroom to hold make-up or perfume. 

best part. 

it's custom. 

choose your design. colors. monogram.

if you want your own adorable tray leave a comment and you will automatically be entered to win.

winner announced wednesday. 

so you have a few days to enter.

seriously don't be shy.

just enter.

it is really cute and durable.

you may win.

check out www.shopcrystalfaye.com

***

i am making infinity scarves again (email me to place an order) and ava needed one her size.

how cute?

leave a comment because it is nice to win free stuff.

two years later.

today is the two anniversary of completing my very last chemo.

ahhhhhhhhhh

two things: i still can not even believe that i even had cancer and i will always hate chemo. thankful for it. but hate it all the same.

i never want to go back there again.

we made this video to remember. to remember where we were and where we had been...and now seeing where we have come.

in two years we have grown. we have changed. we moved. lost pop pop and welcomed sweet little lyla. in between some many little things and big things that are all making me into who i was created to be.

i am thankful for life and for health and for everything in the past years that are all apart of my story. it has often felt like a lot. especially lately i have been overcome with emotion of grief and loss and shock. that same emotional heart turned into joy and disbelief and thankfulness as i look at lyla everyday. i remembering thinking about what life would be like for ava without me and how her little life would be different than most of her friends because she had lost her mommy when she was a baby. but that is not her story. not only is that NOT her story but now she is big sister. she has a new best friend that i never imagined would be possible. but it is. she is laying right next to me as i write and i get lost her little eyes and how i think she looks a little like me when i was a baby. selfishly i love that. our lyla teddy.

it is good to reflect sometimes. to see how we have grown and how seasons change. 

if life seems hard right now...it wont always be this hard.

if life feels easy and joyful...soak it in baby.

for our family we are living in the in between. full hearts among broken hearts.

it wont always be this way. i know that. cancer taught me so much. i never thought it would end. but it did end. two years ago it ended. praying it has ended forever.

***

giveaway details tomorrow.

sneak peek:

 it's from this site

www.shopcrystalfaye.com

her site is loaded with new items. check back tomorrow.

two years.

tomorrow it will be the two year anniversary of my last chemo

and to celebrate one day early we got the results of my PET scan today:

ALL CLEAR. STILL CANCER FREE.

in the midst of deep grief, sleepless nights, some baby blues, watching a lot of friday night lights, learning how to be a mom to two little ladies, falling in love with lyla and loving ava in a whole new way. it has been a roller coaster of emotions. lots of tears and i kind of cry a lot. 

today was full of joy. the relief of hearing our dr say: the scan was clear.

i really have no words to describe how thankful my heart is tonight. not only did this once cancer filled body beat cancer, but carried a baby again, and is now not just celebrating continued healing but...like my sweet friend just wrote down in a little card..."the Lord healed you so you could give life to your precious little Lyla." it really is gift to be healthy and strong even though i have felt so weak and sad these past weeks...my body is healed and lyla is here and she is healthy and she has her mom.

tonight we celebrate.

justin spent most of the day with ava while i got my scan. he's not allowed back in the room with me. little girl did great with a bottle for the first time (can't nurse for 6-8 hrs after scan or hold lyla for 2-4 hrs). justin is the best dad. he did so well with his girl.

 i took this picture and i was real jealous.

 

finally back in her mama's arms. oh, baby i love you.

be back tomorrow with a super fun giveaway 

and a remembering where we were and where we are now.